My phone plan was running out and Deidre wanted me to have a phone on which I could access e mail. We are planning as if a clear scan in March is a done-deal and I'm going to be doing some work for our company come April. I am not a hi-tech phone groupie but I ended up with a Droid--the Google and Verizon answer to the I Phone. I may have to turn in my Droid if the Cool Inspectors ever come around to check, but so far no one has objected to a bland guy like me having such a phone.
Sandy, a Master Gardener who Deidre and I know, came by the house this morning and talked to me about how to improve the look of the front yard. We agreed that a huge rhododendron needs to be cut back and shaped. We also agreed that some evergreen shrubs that front about two-thirds of the house need to be taken out. In short, we agreed that the yard is overgrown.
The bed up against the house will have to cleared out before a planting plan can be drawn. Decisions will have to be made once enough vegetation is removed to actually see what ground is available. We may end up with a Japaneses maple, and some cotoneaster. Or we may not. Sandy gave me some great reference books to peruse and study, books that inform about plants for Ohio. I used to know something about plants but I've forgotten most of what I knew. Anyway, all that I knew concerned plants in zone 8b and 9, not in zone 5. It will all be a fun learning process.
I hope you are all well and that your lives are filled with love.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
The Good Life
I visited the doctor yesterday. Since I don't have health insurance just now I didn't get scanned--I'll have one in March--but he poked and prodded and asked about new lumps and bumps to be worried about. Nope, not a one. But I did tell him that my energy gain has plateaued somewhere below what it was before I got sick and that my back and shoulder and neck still cramp, sometimes severely.
When my talking finally trailed off, the doc paused before speaking.
"Sometimes it's just how you look at things," he said. "I'm an optimist slash realist and I have a lot of hope for your future."
I hadn't realized I was whining, but that's exactly what I was doing. Shame is an emotion I try to stay away from but I certainly felt embarrassed. Self-pity makes everything ugly. It blots out the brightly colored life and sentences one to live in an ashen world. I apologized to him; He seemed to accept it and off we went.
Actually, off he went. An RN came in and asked if I'd complete a survey to help University Hospitals better communicate with cancer patients. Yes. I always agree to those kinds of requests.
I don't know whether the questions will enhance communications between the hospital staff and patients but they certainly got me in touch with gratitude for my life. The questions below are paraphrased but they are true to the essence of the ones on the survey. Although I could answer a loud and clear yes to each of the questions below, it occurred to me that some, maybe many, cancer patients cannot. I've done nothing to deserve the right to answer in the affirmative--it's just a gift.
Do you have someone in your life who will listen to you?
Do you have someone in your life who supports you?
Do you have someone in your life to whom you can tell your inner most thoughts?
Do you believe in God or a Higher Power?
Is your spirituality important to you?
Does someone in your life tell you that he/she loves you?
Do you have someone in your life to love?
Do you say, "I love you," regularly?
Do people close to you forgive your faults?
Do you forgive the faults of those close to you?
I have a marriage that I'd never even imagined before. Who knew you could be so happy? My wife has the goods on me and she loves me anyway.
My daughter, a grown woman and mom in her own right, and I are very close. I talk to her more now than when she was in high school when we lived in the same house, and we were close then. She is one of my best friends.
Another great friend used to be my jogging buddy. A retired Presbyterian minsiter, he was blinded in a botched operation. On some days his blindness and my cancer make it necessary for us to hold one another up. He is a wonderful guy who many have rallied around and he deserves every bit of love he gets.
I can't list all the other people my life because there are too many. They are supportive and loving and interesting.
Other questions on the survey asked about my relationship with a God/Higher Power.
Do you blame God for your cancer? Heck no!
Do you think God loves you? As I perceive Him/Her/Them, yes.
Do you pray? Sure, every day, all through the day, but I don't usually look at God as Santa Clause. I rarely ask him for an outcome, but I do pray regularly for courage, compassion, wisdom, a sense of humor, faith and humility. I figure if I'm granted those things I can handle whatever else comes along.
My trip to The Ireland Cancer Center was one of the most successful I've had. I did get a flu shot but mostly what I got was meds for the soul. I was reminded just how good I have it. I was reminded that I have the kind of life I always dreamed of. The fact that I have cancer does not change that fact one bit.
When my talking finally trailed off, the doc paused before speaking.
"Sometimes it's just how you look at things," he said. "I'm an optimist slash realist and I have a lot of hope for your future."
I hadn't realized I was whining, but that's exactly what I was doing. Shame is an emotion I try to stay away from but I certainly felt embarrassed. Self-pity makes everything ugly. It blots out the brightly colored life and sentences one to live in an ashen world. I apologized to him; He seemed to accept it and off we went.
Actually, off he went. An RN came in and asked if I'd complete a survey to help University Hospitals better communicate with cancer patients. Yes. I always agree to those kinds of requests.
I don't know whether the questions will enhance communications between the hospital staff and patients but they certainly got me in touch with gratitude for my life. The questions below are paraphrased but they are true to the essence of the ones on the survey. Although I could answer a loud and clear yes to each of the questions below, it occurred to me that some, maybe many, cancer patients cannot. I've done nothing to deserve the right to answer in the affirmative--it's just a gift.
Do you have someone in your life who will listen to you?
Do you have someone in your life who supports you?
Do you have someone in your life to whom you can tell your inner most thoughts?
Do you believe in God or a Higher Power?
Is your spirituality important to you?
Does someone in your life tell you that he/she loves you?
Do you have someone in your life to love?
Do you say, "I love you," regularly?
Do people close to you forgive your faults?
Do you forgive the faults of those close to you?
I have a marriage that I'd never even imagined before. Who knew you could be so happy? My wife has the goods on me and she loves me anyway.
My daughter, a grown woman and mom in her own right, and I are very close. I talk to her more now than when she was in high school when we lived in the same house, and we were close then. She is one of my best friends.
Another great friend used to be my jogging buddy. A retired Presbyterian minsiter, he was blinded in a botched operation. On some days his blindness and my cancer make it necessary for us to hold one another up. He is a wonderful guy who many have rallied around and he deserves every bit of love he gets.
I can't list all the other people my life because there are too many. They are supportive and loving and interesting.
Other questions on the survey asked about my relationship with a God/Higher Power.
Do you blame God for your cancer? Heck no!
Do you think God loves you? As I perceive Him/Her/Them, yes.
Do you pray? Sure, every day, all through the day, but I don't usually look at God as Santa Clause. I rarely ask him for an outcome, but I do pray regularly for courage, compassion, wisdom, a sense of humor, faith and humility. I figure if I'm granted those things I can handle whatever else comes along.
My trip to The Ireland Cancer Center was one of the most successful I've had. I did get a flu shot but mostly what I got was meds for the soul. I was reminded just how good I have it. I was reminded that I have the kind of life I always dreamed of. The fact that I have cancer does not change that fact one bit.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Random Thoughts
Is it just me, or do others suck in their stomachs before they step onto a scale?
Deidre and I had a great weekend. On Saturday afternoon we called and invited some nearby friends to play a board game, eat pizza and watch a black and white Bogart and Bacall movie. Plus, Deidre made shortbread for dessert. (I was in heaven when I was in Scotland as a young man--short bread and single malt whiskey. I cut back on one because of weight and cholesterol and gave up the other because I kept waking up in strange places.)
Our cat, Boudreaux, really misses Dianne, the lady we had as a next-door neighbor in Concord Township. We knew that she set out treats for Boudreaux but we had no idea how many she must have set out. Sans Dianne, the cat is always hungry; there are pumas that don't eat as much as Boudreaux. I'm pretty sure he looks at me at times with his mouth watering, and wonders if he could eat all of me in one setting.
I can't remember if I wrote about going to the Museum of Art to see the Gauguin show. I now know a lot more about the painter than I did before. Gauguin was trying to paint expressionless art, to which the viewer is supposed to bring the story of the painting. Since modernity seems to disdain standards--good, bad; right, wrong--and responsibility, maybe Gauguin was the first genuinely modern artist.
I was at a meeting last night and picked up a pamphlet entitled Emotional Maturity. Among other traits, being patient, taking responsibility for one's own actions and not expecting special treatment are all listed. It would be fair to point out that we live in an immature society but I think I'll concentrate on my own lack of maturity. I am impatient. I sometimes look for others to blame for my troubles. I don't know that I wallow in self pity but I do splash around in it from time to time. And I admit to seeking special treatment from time to time, especially since being diagnosed with cancer.
Although I've worked for years on giving up some of the character defects brought out in Emotional Maturity--with varying degrees of success--others will make my target list for the first time. One must continue to do the best one can.
I am one of the teachers for the First and Second Grade Sunday School class at First Unitarian Church on Shaker Blvd. Yesterday, as I'm sure Sunday-schoolers did all over the area, my kids made a gratitude list. At the top of one little boy's list was The Five Senses. I don't remember seeing that on a gratitude list before and I thought is was worth noting. (He is a very bright kid who constantly asks questions and makes comments.)
Time to move on. I hope you life is filled with love.
Deidre and I had a great weekend. On Saturday afternoon we called and invited some nearby friends to play a board game, eat pizza and watch a black and white Bogart and Bacall movie. Plus, Deidre made shortbread for dessert. (I was in heaven when I was in Scotland as a young man--short bread and single malt whiskey. I cut back on one because of weight and cholesterol and gave up the other because I kept waking up in strange places.)
Our cat, Boudreaux, really misses Dianne, the lady we had as a next-door neighbor in Concord Township. We knew that she set out treats for Boudreaux but we had no idea how many she must have set out. Sans Dianne, the cat is always hungry; there are pumas that don't eat as much as Boudreaux. I'm pretty sure he looks at me at times with his mouth watering, and wonders if he could eat all of me in one setting.
I can't remember if I wrote about going to the Museum of Art to see the Gauguin show. I now know a lot more about the painter than I did before. Gauguin was trying to paint expressionless art, to which the viewer is supposed to bring the story of the painting. Since modernity seems to disdain standards--good, bad; right, wrong--and responsibility, maybe Gauguin was the first genuinely modern artist.
I was at a meeting last night and picked up a pamphlet entitled Emotional Maturity. Among other traits, being patient, taking responsibility for one's own actions and not expecting special treatment are all listed. It would be fair to point out that we live in an immature society but I think I'll concentrate on my own lack of maturity. I am impatient. I sometimes look for others to blame for my troubles. I don't know that I wallow in self pity but I do splash around in it from time to time. And I admit to seeking special treatment from time to time, especially since being diagnosed with cancer.
Although I've worked for years on giving up some of the character defects brought out in Emotional Maturity--with varying degrees of success--others will make my target list for the first time. One must continue to do the best one can.
I am one of the teachers for the First and Second Grade Sunday School class at First Unitarian Church on Shaker Blvd. Yesterday, as I'm sure Sunday-schoolers did all over the area, my kids made a gratitude list. At the top of one little boy's list was The Five Senses. I don't remember seeing that on a gratitude list before and I thought is was worth noting. (He is a very bright kid who constantly asks questions and makes comments.)
Time to move on. I hope you life is filled with love.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Journalism
If you don't distrust all American media and worry that American journalists are just a bunch of swamp sales people, you aren't paying attention.
Go here to read about how the "death panel" lie was aided and abetted by the mainstream media.
Go here to read about how the "death panel" lie was aided and abetted by the mainstream media.
Friday, November 13, 2009
Random Thoughts
Great news! I have a sinus infection. You may think my joy at being diagnosed with sinusitis is weird but I was afraid that I'd been feeling horrible for the last month for nothing. Or worse, maybe my head ached and my sense of balance was off because of a tumor up behind my eyes. (I know. I know. I try to dismiss such thoughts but they do come from time to time. After all, I have a cancer that all the docs tell me will come back, and soon.) Anyway, the sinus behind my eyes is full and inflamed, and my primary doc tells me that it can be infected without showing obvious signs. I am taking antibiotics and I already feel better.
We've now met all of our immediate neighbors. One house next door on Berkshire is occupied by an elderly lady named Bunny. She lives in the house that was original to the farm developed to produce Cleveland Heights. Her daughter, who has emphysema, lives with her.
In the house on the other side of us lives a stay at home mom with an MBA, her husband and two little girls. Very nice people, they have gone out of their way to make us feel welcome and the little girls just love our chocolate Lab, Watson.
Off of our backyard lives another old lady who, besides her name, I don't know much about and a young woman who is a violinist with the Cleveland Orchestra. She has a beautiful, confident daughter who came over and asked to cultivate two scrawny tomato plants that the previous owner had planted and left. The plants were in sad shape, but the little girl was satisfied with being allowed to pull them up.
The woman violinist's husband is also a violinist-- for another city's orchestra. When she came over to see us, Deidre took her in and showed her some of the changes we are planning for the house. In conversation about home repairs and updates, our neighbor said, "My husband is pretty handy for a violinist." A great line I thought.
I've ordered a personalized license plate that reads, OK2BKND. I hope that it will serve as a reminder to me.
Deidre and I will be going to the symphony for the first time in three years on Friday the 20th. Along with Strauss's Also Sprach Zarathustra, the theme for 2001, Dvorak's cello concerto will be featured. Dvorak is among my favorite composers so I am looking forward to hearing cellist Alisa Weilerstein do her thing.
After Strauss and Dvorak, there will be post-concert music. The concert on Friday is different from others I've attended--early start time, no intermission and a post-concert. It will be fun to see and hear what it's all about.
Pretty day here in Cleveland Heights. Sunny, mild. I wish I could bottle up this sunshine because it will disappear soon and not return until March. Of course there's always Christmas lights to look forward to.
I was at the old house yesterday to meet vendors who did repairs to some of what the house inspector found. A plumber fixed a leak in a tub's overflow by putting in a small plate over the gasket. I'd never seen such a plate; All the overflows I've ever seen had only the gasket. It was a cheap fix and the bill was reasonable even after Joe put in a new sump pump. I've dealt with Joe of McHugh's plumbing twice now and have been impressed both times. McHugh's gets awards from Angie's List on a regular basis.
A chimney sweep came by and cleaned out the chimney. The inspector said the damper was missing but he was just turning the handle the wrong way. (Kind of made me doubt all the rest of his findings.) The chimney is good to go.
Today a roofer is doing repairs to a section of a roof that supposedly has an active leak. I had two roofers look at the problem area. They both said the inspector is full of it--that the leak is an old one--but I had one of the guys address the problem as well as he could. Maybe the big wind a couple of winters ago forced up some shingles and allowed the water in. I don't really know but the buyers wanted the problem addressed, so I did.
I should write something on What Are You Trying to Conserve, but I'm so dispirited by our national politicians that I don't have the juice. What may have done me in is finding out that the government shipped swine flu vaccine to Wall Street firms. Money shouldn't be able to buy anything you want, to always put you in the front of the line. Meanwhile, my daughter can't find a flu shot for my granddaughter. I don't know the word for the level of disgust I feel about the government hacks who would make such a decision.
Okay, time to get on with the day. I have some more work to do before Deidre and I go to the movies.
We've now met all of our immediate neighbors. One house next door on Berkshire is occupied by an elderly lady named Bunny. She lives in the house that was original to the farm developed to produce Cleveland Heights. Her daughter, who has emphysema, lives with her.
In the house on the other side of us lives a stay at home mom with an MBA, her husband and two little girls. Very nice people, they have gone out of their way to make us feel welcome and the little girls just love our chocolate Lab, Watson.
Off of our backyard lives another old lady who, besides her name, I don't know much about and a young woman who is a violinist with the Cleveland Orchestra. She has a beautiful, confident daughter who came over and asked to cultivate two scrawny tomato plants that the previous owner had planted and left. The plants were in sad shape, but the little girl was satisfied with being allowed to pull them up.
The woman violinist's husband is also a violinist-- for another city's orchestra. When she came over to see us, Deidre took her in and showed her some of the changes we are planning for the house. In conversation about home repairs and updates, our neighbor said, "My husband is pretty handy for a violinist." A great line I thought.
I've ordered a personalized license plate that reads, OK2BKND. I hope that it will serve as a reminder to me.
Deidre and I will be going to the symphony for the first time in three years on Friday the 20th. Along with Strauss's Also Sprach Zarathustra, the theme for 2001, Dvorak's cello concerto will be featured. Dvorak is among my favorite composers so I am looking forward to hearing cellist Alisa Weilerstein do her thing.
After Strauss and Dvorak, there will be post-concert music. The concert on Friday is different from others I've attended--early start time, no intermission and a post-concert. It will be fun to see and hear what it's all about.
Pretty day here in Cleveland Heights. Sunny, mild. I wish I could bottle up this sunshine because it will disappear soon and not return until March. Of course there's always Christmas lights to look forward to.
I was at the old house yesterday to meet vendors who did repairs to some of what the house inspector found. A plumber fixed a leak in a tub's overflow by putting in a small plate over the gasket. I'd never seen such a plate; All the overflows I've ever seen had only the gasket. It was a cheap fix and the bill was reasonable even after Joe put in a new sump pump. I've dealt with Joe of McHugh's plumbing twice now and have been impressed both times. McHugh's gets awards from Angie's List on a regular basis.
A chimney sweep came by and cleaned out the chimney. The inspector said the damper was missing but he was just turning the handle the wrong way. (Kind of made me doubt all the rest of his findings.) The chimney is good to go.
Today a roofer is doing repairs to a section of a roof that supposedly has an active leak. I had two roofers look at the problem area. They both said the inspector is full of it--that the leak is an old one--but I had one of the guys address the problem as well as he could. Maybe the big wind a couple of winters ago forced up some shingles and allowed the water in. I don't really know but the buyers wanted the problem addressed, so I did.
I should write something on What Are You Trying to Conserve, but I'm so dispirited by our national politicians that I don't have the juice. What may have done me in is finding out that the government shipped swine flu vaccine to Wall Street firms. Money shouldn't be able to buy anything you want, to always put you in the front of the line. Meanwhile, my daughter can't find a flu shot for my granddaughter. I don't know the word for the level of disgust I feel about the government hacks who would make such a decision.
Okay, time to get on with the day. I have some more work to do before Deidre and I go to the movies.
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